


Silence from you means anxiety

by I_am_a_color_13



Category: SKAM (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-01
Updated: 2017-08-01
Packaged: 2018-12-09 19:57:27
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,338
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11676015
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/I_am_a_color_13/pseuds/I_am_a_color_13
Summary: Yousef doesn't answer Sana's calls or texts for two days straight.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hellooooo, it’s me! the girl who couldn’t write angst but tried anyway! This is for skammonth week 3 day 2 on tumblr

An other hour has gone by.

Still no answer.

Why?

She needs him to answer, to be sure that everything is alright between them. She wants to make things right.

Damn it, she hates arguing with him!

She wanted to call him right after their argument to fix it because she hates being angry at him and the thought that he might be angry at her but instead she waited until this morning to text him.

_**Sana** : Hey! How are you?_

He didn’t reply. She texted him this afternoon and he didn’t reply.

_**Sana** : ???? _

_**Sana** : what’s wrong? Can we talk?_

 

Now it’s late and he isn’t answering her calls. She tried calling him three times and each time she didn’t get any reply, only his registered voicemail message.

What is he doing? What is he playing at?

This isn’t like Yousef to do this kind of thing. He’s usually the first one to call whenever they have an argument. Which happens so rarely to them that she can counts them on one hand. At first she’s fuming but the more she thinks about it, the more concerned she gets.

 

She worries all night long about what it could mean and what if the argument is worse than she realizes? He never went a day without texting her since they’ve been dating. He never forgot to send her a good night message and now, it’s been two days since he hasn’t done it and why isn’t he answering her calls?.

She tosses and turns in her bed all night long going from one mood to another, persuaded through it all that something is wrong and that she has no idea what it is because their argument wasn’t even that bad.

 

What happened was that they had a date planned in the evening. She had bought tickets for a show and had told him, 3 weeks ago, to mark the date. She was really looking forward to it and was getting ready when he called her telling her abruptly that he couldn’t make it to their date tonight and that he had to cancel. She could hear that he was sorry and he kept on apologizing and saying he’d make it up to her but she was really disappointed at the thought of not going to the show with him.

He explained that he was late in his preparation for a project for his job which he was supposed to present the day after. He wasn’t ready even if he had thought he would be by the time of their date. But it was taking him longer than expected. She was angry because he hadn’t warned her earlier or told her about it and now he was canceling and there was no way they could get a reimbursement on the tickets! She understood that he was running out of time but she wished he could have told her earlier or at least warned her about it. It went on for a while but nothing more was said until they said their goodbyes.

And that was it. Nothing really bad was said. No one screamed or cried or said something mean so why on earth wasn’t he replying to her calls and texts? He wasn’t the kind of person to be upset that much over something like that.

She keeps playing and replaying the conversation in her mind all night, wondering where things might have gone wrong and checking her phone every five minutes to see if he has replied or at least read her texts.

 

The next morning, she texts him as soon as she wakes up.

_**Sana** : is something wrong? it’s not like you to leave me with no reply like that? what’s going on? _

No reply even an hour later. She calls him but he doesn’t pick up the phone.

_**Sana** : Call me!!!_

The more she thinks about it and paces around her room, the less angry she is and the more worried she becomes. Because this isn’t right at all. Something must be wrong with him.

 

Elias is away for the weekend which means that he might not know much about the situation but she decides to ask him about it and calls him.

_\- Hey!_

_\- Hello sister! How are you doing? Are you missing me?_

_\- Of course not, you’ve been gone for not even two days._

_\- You’re hurting my feelings there, Sana._

_\- Yeah, right. Listen,…have you heard anything from Yousef since friday?_

_\- Nope, he’s been quiet all week-end._

_\- Oh, ok._

_\- Why? Is something wrong?_

_\- Uh, well, he isn’t answering to any of my calls or texts._

_\- Uh? That’s weird._

_\- I know!_

_\- Have you tried calling his place?_

_\- No one answered._

_\- Oh his parents went to their cabin so if he was out no one could pick up the phone._

_\- Can you try texting him to see if he replies to you?_

_\- Yes of course but why would he reply to me and not to you? It’s usually the other way around these days._

 

After an hour he still hasn’t replied to Elias. He even tried to call him

 

She is now certain that something must have happened to him. That this isn’t him being angry because she was angry. This is something else, something that scares her. What if something happened to him? What if he’s hurt or sick or got into an accident? What if he’s lying in a hospital somewhere on his own?

Or maybe he’s just ignoring her and asked Elias to tell her that he’s not answering him as well?

Of course not! Elias wouldn’t go along.

And Yousef wouldn’t do that. There has to be a logical explanation. His parent went to their cabin so maybe he joined them and forgot to tell her and because the signal is bad there he couldn’t tell her when he arrived?

She needs to clear her mind and relax but it’s the hardest thing to do when your boyfriend seems to have disappeared from the surface of the earth. And she keeps telling herself that she shouldn’t doubt him but when he’s not answering it’s hard not to.

 

On Sunday afternoon, she goes out to a coffee with the girls and tells them her worries when they keep on asking her what’s wrong. They’ve gotten so much better at reading her that they refuse to accept her excuse of being a little tired and make her spill the events of the last days. They immediately try to reassure her by telling her that there must be a logical explanation as to why he isn’t answering. An explanation that isn’t the fact that he is trying to break up with her by ignoring her.

-” Yousef isn’t like that Sana, he wouldn’t break up with you for something unimportant”, says Noora

-” He wouldn’t break up with her at all! says Vilde, He’s her soulmate, he loves her and will never leave her!”

\- “Yeah, Yossi isn’t like that”, says Chris

\- “Then why isn’t he answering? The only two options are that he wants to break up or that something happened to him!”

-” Well it’s definitely not the first one, that’s for sure,”replies Eva

\- “Then is it the second? Is he hurt somewhere? Am I supposed to worry less?”

\- “Oh! What if he got kidnapped by a gang? Maybe he was walking home on Friday evening after leaving the library and got attacked by a gang in a dark alley! I saw a documentary about someone who got kidnapped and escaped once.”

\- “Chris! Not helping!”

\- “Oh yes, sorry! But don’t worry Sana, I’m sure that even if he was kidnapped, Yossi would be smart enough to escape without a scratch”

\- “Uh…Thank you, I guess?”

Eva puts a reassuring hand on her shoulder and Vilde asks her:

\- “Has he ever ignored you before?”

\- “No, this is the first time we’ve gone so long without talking since we started dating”

Noora bites her lip and says once again:

-”I’m sure there’s a logical explanation, Sana. he’s fine.”

But Sana notices the glance she exchanges with Eva and how Vilde and Chris both look worried and it only makes her feel worse.

There are only two explanations possible and both are awful.

She receives a text from Elias telling her that he went to Yousef’s place after coming back to Oslo and rang but that no one opened the door. He looked up but all the lights were off and the windows closed. Which doesn’t reassure her and her mind is swirling around these questions that keep on making her more and more nervous.

When she tells the girls the news, none of them can hide their worries anymore. They try to cheer her up but she just feels too bad.

It seems more and more likely that something happened to him. Something bad. She makes a mental list of all the hospitals she can call to get informations as she makes her way home.

 

When she steps into her apartment, she hears voices in the living room. Probably Elias with his friends. Maybe she should go see them and ask for infos? Maybe one of the other boy has some news?

As she makes her way to the living room, she hears a laugh and freezes. Could that be him?

No, surely Elias would have told her! She must be imagining things now.

She arrives in the living room and all the boys at here, all five of them are here.

Even Yousef.

He’s sitting in the middle of his friends and he has his back to her. The first think she feels is relief as she lets out a breath she didn’t know she was holding. Relief because he’s alright. He looks fine, he’s smiling, he’s not hurt. He is laughing now and, ,damn it she missed him. It’s only been two days but she has been so worried. She says his name without even realizing it. She doesn’t say it loud but he hears her and turns to her.

As he looks at her with what seems like worry, she suddenly realizes that if the reason why he didn’t reply to her wasn’t because he was hurt, then the only option left is not one he thinks she can handle. He stands up and walks towards her, saying her name softly and she suddenly doesn’t want to hear what he has to say because there’s no way she’s going to like it. He just stands there in front of her and she’s torned between reaching to hug him and retreating into her room.

He stays silent then looks back as she startles when the boys stand up to go in the garden because “they need to enjoy the sun”.

-” It’s February and it’s 5 pm, where is the sun?” She asks

\- “Don’t be such a spoilsport! We’re going to enjoy the last bit of it!”

When the boys are gone and they’re alone in the room at last, they awkwardly stand in front of each other for a while until she can’t bear it anymore and let it out :

-” Listen, whatever you want to say to me just do it, Yousef! It’s been two days, you should be ready now.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You get your answers (hope you’re not too disappointed by the explanation, I tried to keep it very Yousef-like lol)

_\- Listen, whatever you want to say to me just do it, Yousef! It’s been two days, you should be ready now._

 

Yousef’s eyes widened and he opened his mouth slightly, staying frozen for a few seconds. Seconds during which Sana wanted to simultaneously run, shake him, smile, hug him, snap at him. 

\- “What?”

\- “What what?”

\- “What do you mean by “ whatever you want to say to me ” ? “

\- “Yeah, whatever took you two days to think about to the point where you were avoiding me for two days straight!”

\- “ Avoiding you? What…? “

\- “Just say it. I don’t think I’ll like it but this is killing me, Yousef!”

\- “Listen, hear me out, just listen.”

\- “Oh, I’m listening! I’ve been listening since friday evening and got nothing to listen!”

She’s getting angry now, voice raising up and taking a step forward.

\- “I’m sorry, my phone broke down and…”

\- “For 2 days? You’re going to have to come with a better excuse than this one.” 

\- “Let me explain, I swear, it’s not like that!”

\- “It better not be.”

He takes a step back whn he hears the sharpness in her tone and nervously plays with the front of his snapback. Why is he wearing a snapback indoors anyway? 

\- “After our “talk”, I left the library to come home and that’s when I realized that my phone had turn itself off. I rushed home to get my charger because I already wanted to call you back but then I realized that I had forgotten my keys and I couldn’t call anyone at home because my family was gone on a trip. You know I have an old aunt in Oslo?”

\- “ Yes but why is that relevant?”

\- “ Because the library isn’t far from my aunt’s home so I went there to have a place to sleep. That’s where I’ve been for the last two days.” 

\- “ Weren’t you supposed to work on saturday? “

\- “ Well, I’ve also been to work on Saturday to do the presentation of course – again, I’m so sorry we had to cancel our date because of it- but my aunt is old so she doesn’t have any phone charger or anything. Which means I couldn’t contact you and I’m sorry if I missed any calls or texts, I swear I didn’t do it on purpose! “

The situation is finally starting to make sense in Sana’s mind as he keeps on talking.

\- “She took advantage of me being home to make me do all kind of works in her apartment so I didn’t go out after work. My parents came back this morning so I went back home when I knew they’d already be back. And that’s it. I swear I wasn’t ignoring you, Sana.”

-”Oh, ok.

She doesn’t know what to say because the truth is so far from everything she imagined.”

\- “You have to trust me. You can even call her. I swear I wouldn’t ignore you, you know that, right?”

All she can do to reply is hug him as tight as she can. He seems taken aback at first but he quickly wraps his arms around her and she can feel him relax in her arms as he puts his head on her shoulder and lets out a sigh.

After being worried for so long, she enjoys the simple fact of hugging him, of feeling his arms around her and the rhythm of his breathing. He’s back next to her and they’re back together, right where they belong. She sighs against his chest at her ability to make such stupid assumptions that couldn’t be further from the truth. Why did she go into panic so quickly when she knew he would never do anything that could hurt her? She needs to stop thinking the worst is going to happen everytime something doesn’t go smoothly. But for now, she will just enjoy this moment.

\- “So…Does this mean you’re not angry at me anymore?”he says, hesitantly

\- “Angry?? About the date you mean?”

\- “Well, yeah, I did cancel it without any early warning.”

\- “It’s alright, I know how important your work is to you. And I actually thought you were angry at me when you didn’t reply!”

\- “Why would I be angry at you because I’m cancelling a date? Wait, did you think I was angry and that it was the reason why I had cancelled the date?”

\- “No, no, no! I thought afterwards that you were angry at me and that it was the reason you were’nt replying to me! Which sounds silly now, of course.”

\- “Sana, of course not. The argument, was nothing. You had every right to be upset. I’m not angry, I promise.”

He kisses her softly on the forehad then, suddenly, takes a step back .

-”Wait! You thought I had been avoiding you and earlier, when you saw me, you thought I was about to tell you something that you wouldn’t like…Did you think I was so angry that I would… break..?”

He can’t even finish his sentence, as if the only notion of breaking- up with her was not something he could comprehend. Instead of replying, she looks down, because she can see, now, how her assumptions were wrong (but to her defense it had seemed to her like he was ignoring her).

\- “Sana, tell me you didn’t think that!”

\- “I didn’t know what to think! You didn’t answer me or Elias and we had just argued, it was nothing but I got nervous and made it into a big deal. I thought you were clearly avoiding me and angry but then I thought you might have gotten hurt and that maybe you had had an accident and hated myself for arguing with you just before your accident because then the last thing I told you before the accident was that I was disappointed about the cancellation. Which isn’t exactly sweet.”

\- “Sana…”

He lets out a small laugh

\- “I didn’t get any accident, don’t talk about it like that.”

\- “I know but I was so worried Yousef! Why didn’t you call the house?” 

\- “I…”

\- “You know the number right? Yes you do, I gave it to you in case of emergencies! Why didn’t you call?”

\- “Well, um, I …”

\- “You should have used it instead of going to see your aunt and leaving me without any news for two days!”

\- “I…uh. I didn’t want to call.”

He runs his hand through his hair and bites his lips.

\- “You didn’t want to call? I was worried sick and you didn’t want to call? Why wouldn’t you call? You have a way of contacting me and you don’t use it?? “

\- “Ok, so maybe I wasn’t ignoring you but maybe I also wasn’t sure that you’d want to talk to me…”

\- “Yousef…Why wouldn’t I want to talk to you?”

\- “Well, because I had cancelled our date? And because you were angry at me and because I made you waste money on these tickets? And because I didn’t warn you earlier? The last thing you told me was that you were disappointed.”

\- “What?”

She can’t help but laugh at the irony of the situation.

-” This ridiculous, Yousef. Look at us! Both worried sick that the other might not want to talk to us because we argued about one date.”

\- “Well, in my defence, you did tell me that I was insufferable. Also, I’m not the one who thought the other was going to break up with me!”

\- “That’s because you never go two days without replying and we had just argued! And I kind of lost it because I had never thought about it and suddenly it was the only logical option with you being hurt. You should have called the house Yousef. Avoiding conversation is never the right answer, remember?”

-” Sana, Sana.. Nothing would make me break up with you. Just thinking about it, it hurts me.” 

\- “Then, you should have called the house Yousef. Avoiding conversation is never the right answer, remember?” 

-” I’ll remember it next time. Although I hope there won’t be a next time. I’m sorry that I left you so worried, it will never happen again, I promise. I’m staying with you until you can’t stand me and want to get rid of me.”

-“You might have to wait forever for that.”

-” Then, I’ll take forever with you.”

She smiles and he smiles back.

\- “Damn it, we really have a way of making simple situations stressful and complicated, don’t we?”

\- “Don’t put the blame on me, I didn’t do anything this time.”

\- “You didn’t do anything but you made it complicated for yourself on your own. Thinking I could break up with you. What kind of nonsense is that?”

\- “The one you’ll never commit hopefully.”

\- “The one I’ll never commit full stop. No hope needed, this is the truth.”


End file.
